16. Damon: Vampires can't procreate... though we love to try.
17. Damon: I don't Damon. I can't trust you to be a nice guy. You kill everybody and you're so mean. You're so mean. You're very hard to imitate.
18. Stefan: I really liked you better when you hated everybody. Damon: I still do. I just love that they love me.
19. Elena: Trust breeds trust. You have to give it to get it.
20. Damon: Who are you dodging? Jeremy: This girl, Anna. She can be, uh...persistent. Damon: Is she hot? Jeremy: Yeah...yeah, but she can be weird. Damon: Hot trumps weird...trust me.
21. Elena: You look... Damon: Dashing? Gorgeous? Irresistible? Elena: Wrecked. You looked wrecked.
22. Elena: Time out, remember? Five minutes? Well that five minutes is gonna need a beer
23. Elena: I found out who my birth mother is. Damon: Ugh who cares. She left you. She sucks.
24. Damon: Not bad. Have you been eating bunnies?
25. Lexi: Oh..the famous Elena. Elena: Towel girl. Lexi: I've been called worse.
26. Damon: Somewhere along the way, you decided I was worth saving. I wanted to thank you for that.
1. Stefan: Stay away from Elena. Damon: I take that as an invitation
2. Damon: Hello brother.
3. Damon: Some girls just can't resist my good looks, my style, my charm, and my unflinching ability to listen to Taylor Swift.
4. Damon: I couldn`t have him running around, chewing on people, while the town is looking for vampires, now could I?
5. Tyler: Screw you dude. Damon: Dude, really? Dude?
6. Alaric: First person account of the Civil War? That's like porn for a history teacher.
7. Elena: If you wanted me dead, I`d be dead. Damon: Yes, you would. Elena: Which I`m not. Damon: Yet.
8. Damon: And good morning to you, little Miss `I`m on a mission`. Elena: How can you be so arrogant and glimp after everything that you’ve done? Damon: And how could you be so brave, and stupid, to call a vampire arrogant and glimp.
9. Damon: What's so special about this Bella girl? Edward's so whipped.
10. Caroline: Boys like girls, girls like boys - sex…
11. Elena: Am I going to be safe with you? Damon: Yes. Elena: Do you promise not to do that mind control thing with me? Damon: Yes. Elena: Can I trust you? Damon: Get in the car.
12. Damon: I'm getting really bored and impatient; and I don't do bored and impatient.
13. Damon: No Elena! I will not go to your bedroom with you.
14. Damon: I'm Damon, Stefan's brother. Elena: He didn’t tell me he had a brother. Damon: Well, Stefan isn't one to brag.
Damon: I like being a living dead person.
